and i meant to add....

I have so many college baseball related things to be elated about! Ole Miss bites it again!!!! Southern Miss Eagles to the Top! and Geeeeaaauuuux Tigers!!!!

i have an announcement.

We are in the single digits. I see Ben in 9 days. And he leaves Lily this Sunday. Please throw up a prayer for his safe travel, his dislocated shoulder, his ear infection, and patience for his girlfriend who has to wait 9 more days. Also, when you see/meet him, please ask him immediately how the food was in Africa.

Been reading a lot about North Korea in the news lately, and I wanted to share this documentary that Natalie told me about made by the BBC about the situation of children there. Please take the 45 minutes to watch it; this helps shed some light on what's really going on inside that closed country.




If you google "Children of the Secret State", the fourth hit is a blog of someone- apparently a big fan of communism- who refers to it as a propaganda film and says the homeless orphans look "healthy enough". Hmm.

there are roads left in both of our shoes...

I may have taken so long to update this blog that no one's even checking for updates anymore, but if you are...hi!

If you get a chance, read Ben's last couple of blog entries to see what's been going on at Lily. This has been so, so heavy on my heart over the last month or so. I've talked about this so much over the last couple of weeks that I don't feel like there's much more I can say, think, or feel about it. It's hard to see God's hand in all of this, but I'm praying that I can have hope through it anyway. Thinking about it so much has really been draining on my heart and mind, which is why...

I've chosen to blog about something completely meaningless that made me laugh. Yesterday I was unable to resist clicking on an article on FoxNews.com titled "Jessica Biel: It's Hard Being Beautiful". (Those kind of stories always amuse me- some talk show I was watching one time was talking about a similar story and said, "Other burdens the actress has to bear are good health and parents who love her." Ha.) Anyway, Jessica Biel (from the first couple of seasons of the tv show 7th Heaven, a virtual puppy mill of master thespians) was complaining about how sometimes she doesn't get work because she's too pretty. This just tickled me to death. I was trying to imagine how she thinks those conversations between casting directors must go:
"Oh, Jessica Biel, she's SO talented...."
"Oh, she's been in so many things, like ummm....that movie about the magician...that... wasn't as good as The Prestige."
"She is amazing. But we don't usually like to put attractive people in movies. She's just too beautiful, people may not want to look at her."
"You're right. We need someone uglier. What's Angelina Jolie up to?"
Whatever gets her by, I suppose.

Vaguely related to that, I'm going to be in California 4 weeks from today!

Things I've been up to the past month:
1) Sleeping during the daytime.
2) Not going to church. I'm not supposed to work every weekend, so why am I always always there?
3) Only being halfway successful in my efforts to keep 2 plants alive.
4) Exercising in Centennial Park every nice day I'm not working.
5) Rereading Harry Potter book 1-7, which I thought would take me a while, but I started about 2 1/2 weeks ago and am already in book 6.
6) Discovering and loving Pandora.com, way behind the curve.
7) Trying to drink my daily 8 glasses of water and failing Every. Single. Day.
8) Spending quality time with Miss Palmer.
9) Seeing Death Cab for Cutie at the Ryman. Oh, so good.
10) Not blogging.
11) Wishing June 17th would hurry up.
12) Trying to catch up on my devotions. I bought a chronological Bible, which I was pretty psyched about, until I got stuck for weeks in cubits, censuses, and divisions of land amongst the 12 tribes.
13) Renewing my PALS certification, running 2 mock codes, and successfully saving the lives of 2 limbless mannequin children. Being a hero, basically.
14) Praying for Lily with Natalie.
15) Finding reasons not to vaccum.

The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still. (Ex 14:14)

sweet home alabama...

Last week I had a 6 day stretch off of work and I took advantage of that time to go to the beach with my mom. I drove down to Gulf Shores and stayed for a couple of days, and the weather was great and it was relaxing and wonderful. If I happened to have children, and they happened to be with me on this trip, I definitely could have taken advantage of the various signs I saw to teach a little grammar lesson. South Alabama in particular seems to have some difficulty with the apostrophe. For example, "Tan's Unlimited"? Wrong. "Carl's Premium Deer Processing"? Correct! "Linda's Psychic Reading's"? Almost, but not quite. "World of Outlaws Southern Motor Speedway"? There we go! "DVD's Due By Noon"? No, but "Spear Hunting Museum"? Umm . . .well there's no opportunity for an apostrophe there but I just wanted to point out that there is an actual spear hunting museum outside of Foley. There's a painting on the front with a man in camo holding a spear.

To anyone at work who might be jealous of my time at the beach, rest assured that my patients the night I came back were more than enough punishment for my good time.

he's got a great personality.

When I came back from Africa my friend Steve was quizzing me about my main squeeze, and asked his fairly standard Steve question of, "If someone was going to play him in a movie, which actor would it be?"

I pondered for a few minutes, and on the basis of coloring and a very nice smile I picked this guy:

I know, right?

But due to a recent and unfortunate turn of events, I'm afraid I have to withdraw my nomination and say that my dear boyfriend would now most closely resemble this guy:

That's right, Harry Shearer from A Mighty Wind.

Sigh.

For more details on how this transformation took place, check out Ben's blog linked to the right.

there is no better find, than to find myself with you

Happy 1st Day of Spring! Has it been nearly a month since I posted last?

What's been happening this month.....well, I've become nocturnal. (I would like to say that between typing the word "nocturnal" and now I did what I knew what happen sooner or later, and that is setting off my alarm system to my apartment by flinging open my back door to see the sunlight and the beautiful weather. But now I know that it works, and it is incredibly loud. I seriously hope that no one else was home...and as I just typed that sentence I heard a door shut in the building. Sorry neighbors.)

Katie and Natalie, two of my roommates from Lily, came to visit me this week on their respective spring breaks. It was so wonderful to have them here and to talk about the kids, the things we missed and don't miss, the things we learned and are still learning. Natalie and I talked yesterday about how the things I expected to struggle with I never did, and the things I never would have thought would have been problems were. I wouldn't take it back for anything, but all in all I have to say it was probably a different experience than I thought I would have. But on Saturday night after some griping about things that need to change (mostly from me), Nat suggested we pray and we were able to lift up the kids, the leaders, and the volunteers at Lily. (which, I freely admit that sometimes I feel like that's doing "nothing" as if asking God to handle stuff is less effective than me doing it myself. He's so lucky to have me down here taking care of things for Him.)

And then we ate. And ate. Sunday afternoon at the Pancake Pantry (while Katie enjoyed her bacon) we realized Natalie was viewing this as some kind of cultural expedition. I had to explain to her what moonshine was. With enough sweet tea, gorgeous weather, and biscuits from the Loveless Cafe I think she's now a believer in our way of life. And Katie was meant to be Southern all along. She even let me hot roll her hair.

The other night I had a too-cute-for-words 3 year old patient who apparently told his parents after I left the room that I was his girlfriend. Awwww. When I came back in the room they questioned him a little further though and he said "no" when they asked if I was pretty. Low marks for flattery, but high marks for being adorable so I'll keep him anyway.

Yay for LSU and UCLA going to the next round, boo for the Bulldogs getting spanked.

In the next post maybe I'll discuss why all doctors should own their own stethoscopes.

Enjoy the weather!

our bodies get bigger, but our hearts get torn up

The tiny Josh "it's a beautiful world" Casper on my shoulder has been nagging me all day since I made the previous entry. So I thought I'd share my favorite Philip Yancey quote (which I'm pretty sure I've put on here before, but it's good for me to remind myself again):

I have tasted a little of life's tragedy. I have tasted of it's comedy. I keep walking because I believe in the fairy tale, that God strong and wise enough to create a world stamped with such beauty and goodness will be faithful in restoring it to the original design...I place a bet on God's firm promise that in the end, all will be well.

it's a mad mission

but i got the ambition....

First off, I would like to thank my friends who commented last week and assured me that my blog is still read on occasion!

I worked my first weekend back at my job. The biggest challenge so far has been convincing my body that I'm not kidding. I really am doing this to it again. My brain wants to sleep during the day, really badly, but my body's not cooperating. For example, I stayed up late Thursday night hoping to sleep late Friday. I woke up at 8:30. I tried to take a nap that afternoon before I had to go in to work, and slept about 45 minutes. I worked from 7p-7a, and was very tired, but when I got home my body said, "Hey, you can't fool me! It's morning! There's daylight! You should be awake!" I finally fell asleep about 9, and woke up at 12:30. And then repeated that process on Saturday night and Sunday morning. I'm working again tonight, but only from 11p-7a. This shift actually works pretty well for me, because I can usually sleep for a couple hours before I go in because 7 pm is the time my body wants to go to sleep anyway. I know, I'm a party animal.

I wish I could say that it's just been great to be with my patients again, and don't get me wrong, everyone at work has been fantastic and I've had a couple of good nights. But I've just been reminded of the ugliness of this world, which was relatively easy to put out of my mind for the last month or so. I'm going to have to say that I feel that people who believe humans beings are inherently good have never taken care of an abused and battered child. All weekend it was like I could hear someone saying.....we were made for something different than this broken, broken mess. We need redemption.

To lighten up a little: I watched the Oscars last night with Steve & Co. I am so happy that Slumdog Millionaire won, what a great movie. Loved Kate Winslet's dress. Felt super uncomfortable for Jennifer Anniston as she had to ham it up with Jack Black 5 feet in front of her academy award nominated ex-husband and his academy award nominated baby mama. Was slighty baffled by the people there (Sarah Jessica Parker? Miley Cyrus? High School Musical people? Jessica Biel?). Happy for the accountants that carried in the results down the red carpet with a special announcement....you go get your moment of glory, CPAs of America!

it's a mad mad mission
sign me up

you are, reaching...

for something, that is beating

I had to sign into blogger to comment on my friend Claire's blog, so I thought, what the heck! I'll post something. I have NO idea if anyone is still reading this, and I don't know how to put one of those site counters on here. Like most things involving technology, if I don't already know how or can't figure it out in less than 4 seconds, I give up and get my sister to do it. And she's not here.

Well, tomorrow I start back on night shift. It was nice to be part of the world again for a while. I'll miss daylight. I'll have a couple weeks where I'm switching back and forth between 8 am orientation classes and 7p-7a night shifts, so if you see me around I'm not ignoring you, I'm just unconscious.

I really am getting excited about being back at work with my friends though, I've gotten to see a lot of people who I really missed.

I hope everyone had a nice Valentine's Day. I have always liked Valentine's Day, no matter what, mainly because of all the chocolate. Chocolate is good, with or without a boyfriend. (Valentine's Day candy is only trumped by Easter candy, which is awesome because of Reese's, Milky Way, and Snickers eggs.) But Lauren was my domestic valentine...she made us dinner and then went to see a movie, and it was a fun night. AND when I got home from the movie, my thoughtful international valetine had sent me flowers. Tulips and irises, my favorite. So all in all it was a great day. Except that the international valentine is so far away.

Things that made me laugh this week:
1) cakewrecks.blogspot.com (It a gril!)
2) Ben, always
3) 30 Rock (but not The Office =( )
4) Sheila's stories about teaching (I like robots!)
5) gold teeth

i only see you when my sight is lost

Well. I've now spent a week back in Nashville, and it's been good so far. Trying to reconnect with friends has been its own job....it's not always easy to just drop yourself back in the middle of people's lives and get caught up on what's happened in the past 10 months or so. But I've been blessed with some good and gracious friends, who are being patient and supportive.

I don't start work until February 2nd, but I'm renewing my CPR for healthcare providers this week. I just picked up the book from work, which I've started going through and been reminded of what's it's like to study, just a little bit. All I have to say about that is...gross. And, wow I've gotten lazy.

Favorite story of the day: My friend Sheila is an ESL teacher for a public school system in Mississippi. Today I got a text from her that said, "I asked my first graders if they could tell me who our new president was, and Julio announced that it was Broccoli Obama. And the rest of the class agreed wholeheartedly."

I know these posts have not been that interesting....but I'm definitely enjoying a couple weeks of boring before work starts!

But here's a little excitement for you:

For your husband is your Maker
Whose name is the Lord of hosts;
And your Redeemer is the Holy One of Israel,
Who is called the God of all the earth.
(isaiah 54:5)

Lift up your eyes on high
And see who has created these stars...
(isaiah 40:26)

tennessee, january...

everything is ordinary....

I'm officially moved into my apartment in Nashville. I start work in a couple weeks, and I've had Baja Burrito, so things are definitely going back to normal.

Now that I'm actually getting settled and working on reestablishing a life here, it's finally started to sink in that I'm really back- my time at home wasn't just a break, I'm really not going back to Lily, and I'm starting a new season. I've already seen how quickly I can fall back into old habits and ways of thinking, and how hard it is to carry over some of the things that I learned while I was gone. It's going to take some serious discipline and prayer to not waste the things God let me see and experience in Africa.

On a random side note, I just finished reading a book called The Ridiculous Race. I would recommend this book to anyone who is interested in a) the world, and b) laughter. It was written by two friends, Steve Hely and Vali Chandrasekaran, who raced each other around the world in opposite directions without using airplanes. Some of my favorite chapter titles included, "My Parents Prefer Safety Over Awesomeness" and "Susie, the First of Many People I Encountered Who Thought I Had a Learning Disability". It made me laugh out loud, a lot, and also had a lot of interesting stuff about the different places they both traveled. I would let you borrow my copy, but it's in a box on its way to Ben (who I promised I would mention in this blog, and who I'm going to see again in 5 months), so you'll have to get your own copy!

you're unlike anything I see...

football.

Yes, I am ready for some, thank you for asking!

I went to my grandparents' house in Baton Rouge this Monday and the drive down gave me time to do some deep, contemplative thinking- namely about why I hate the Florida Gators. This topic came up because I read an article in the paper that morning about Tim Tebow, and it had a big section about his faith and how important it is to him. I have to say, it kind of took the wind out of my hating-the-Gators sails. I mean, I would still dislike them, but Tebow kind of put a damper on all the fun.

Now, I hate Ole Miss. And I hate Ole Miss for solid, specific, and eternally unchanging reasons. Yes, Oxford is a charming Southern town Square Books William Faulkner blah blah blah. It doesn't change how much I dislike you and want you to lose, Colonel Reb. But when I started to think about it, my reasons for disliking Florida were vague and harder to pinpoint. (It reminded me of when I couldn't resist taking a 'What Kind of Tom Brady Hater Are You?' quiz on MSN sports; it informed me at the end that I was a 'shallow, uninformed Tom Brady hater'. "That's RIGHT!" I said.) I finally decided it was mainly due to Steve Spurrier, who is no longer there, so that wasn't a great reason. It might also have something to do with the fact that they continually insist on defeating LSU, but I try not to think about that.

So, in summary, I will be cheering for Florida in the BCS National Championship game. I mean, I'm just glad that once again the SEC has a team playing for the national championship. (I feel that here is where I need to remind certain individuals that some conferences, such as the PAC 10, have NO teams in the national championship game.) In any case, I'm just excited to see some NCAA football again. Then I can fully devote myself to basketball season!